'Full Throttle' is definitely a song to get you wanting more from Lauren Jennifer, who is also known as The Goth Cowgirl. She tells me the idea for the song came from watching a Mötley Crüe documentary. It depicts the band's journey with addiction and made Lauren reflective on her own circumstances.
Lauren continues to tell me how the song is about being in that journey, where you realise there's a problem, one that's getting worse by the day; and yet you never believe you can stop and break the cycle. Even though stopping may seem difficult at the time, Lauren's proud to be celebrating her 8th year sober this year. Something I think we can all join in celebrating and the song serves as a reminder of the dark times and the strength we all have within us to over come those tender moments.
The song starts with a vibes and nostalgic guitar
"I paint on my face. Everything in place just to be washed away. Get all dressed up, to get, caught in the fire cuz the match that starts it, it will always burn too."
This verse, whilst you'd be forgiven for thinking it's referencing make-up, it suggests that we all carry a facade. Be it a safety barrier to the world or for ourselves, we should embrace who we are and not be ashamed, we no longer need to carry round another face. Getting dressed up and caught in the fire metaphorically depicting not to get caught up in something which you may come to regret.
"Now look at me. Ash an’ wine stains on my pretty outfit. A chaotic soul, hunted by demons trying to nip at, my heels, in my hands, running away from the mess I’ve made."
The imagery of addiction is prominent within this verse, be it smoking or drinking. It references what some may feel to be the 'demons' luring them in, but also realising they need to break the chain, the cycle to get better and are 'running away from the mess I've made'.
"I’ve crossed the line, took too many in my time, spent so long convincing everybody else that I actually believe I’m fine. Each time I’m gettin’ higher but really I’m crashin’ to the bottom. Got my foot on the pedal an’ I’m going full throttle."
The chorus details the denial we face when dealing with addiction. The subtle reference to drug taking another addiction highlighted 'I've crossed the line, took too many in my time' but also to the highs and the crashing lows. The only way to our run the demons, the addiction, is simply to go 'full throttle'. As fast as you can, and as far as you can. It could also be perceived that it's referencing recovery, meaning metaphorically you can never let up.
"It faded quick. How can you see where you’re headed in the dark? No longer what I want. It’s become what I need, a quick relief ‘for my pain takes the driver’s seat"
Seeing in the dark is reflective of the dark moods that may've driven to addiction, or it could come to be symbolic of the moment, whilst in the depth of despair, we realise there is light, there is hope, a chance to break out of the darkness. Our mindsets shift from what we want (the addiction) to what we need (health, happiness, our well-being). 'For my pain takes the driver's seat' vividly depicts how we can function despite feeling numb, and that in order to move forward we allow the pain to take control to enable us to be healed. If we can feel the pain, then we can feel emotion, and if we can feel emotion, we can become deeply in tune with ourselves, our needs and desires.
'Full Throttle' was released 27th February 2023 and is available from your streaming platform. Please do share some love and ensure you follow Lauren Jennifer on her social media and music platforms: https://linktr.ee/laurenjennifermusic?fbclid=PAAaZccyzfQ4qwkaOPQU9u71k6yqhZ_-Ie0873UphD2-dA-a56fFbYFpf1DE0
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